what to do when you're single and lonely.
answer: basically anything except get into a premature relationship.
so, i think i'm most annoyed by women who complain about feeling lonely because i've been there. i know how dangerous it is to pursue a relationship for the sake of having someone else to share a bed with. i understand what it is to feel unbearable discomfort in one's solitude. but, i have also learned firsthand the utter threat to one's sanity, health, and ability to stay alive that is diving into some bullshit, premature relationship. i look at the unhappily single women, with their own homes, transportation, work and income who feel lonely and i pity them. they have the entire world at their fingertips and no bullshit emotional shit to clog or conflict with their interests or progress. and, the only thing they can think to do is...adopt a boyfriend?
i blame television. these women feel incomplete without the presence of "love" in their life. television has convinced all of us that love looks and sounds a specific way. but, we've been confused (because, pssssttt: TV isn't real) and it hurts me to see this. you aren't lacking love in your life simply because you don't have a mate! don't you have friends, family, clients, and community? don't you have other people to share your love and life with? a partnership requires so much time, energy, communication and emotional involvement and it simply needn't be a first choice when one is feeling uncomfortable in one's solitude. perhaps meditating, reflecting, throwing a party, inviting a sister to brunch, going to therapy even - ANYTHING but accepting and allowing the first person who shows a dab of interest into your life and home. save yourself some time, heartache, and dignity. i implore you. reconsider.